The Picnic
by xxquirpxx
Summary: Sequel to "When Two Worlds Collide". Howard and Lucy decide to drag everybody to the country for a picnic, but of course it doesn't go according to plan.


It was a quiet night in the flat. Vince and Anna were at the Velvet Onion, Naboo and Bollo were at Kirk's birthday party and Howard and Lucy were sat together reading in the living room.

"You know what we should do Lucy?" Howard asked the small blue-haired teenager.

"What?" she replied.

"Well, the weather is going to be really good tomorrow and Naboo was talking about keeping the shop shut. Why don't we all go on a picnic?"

"Oh my God yeah! That's a great idea," Lucy smiled.

"We'll need to set off early. Do you wanna text Anna, while I text Naboo and check that they wanna do it?" Howard asked. Lucy nodded, pulling her phone out.

_Hey Anna, _

_Howard and me were wondering if you and Vince wanted to go on a picnic tomorrow. We'll have to set off early, so don't be back too late :P Luce xxx_

_Hi there Naboo,_

_Lucy and I are going on a picnic tomorrow and wondered if you two fancied coming along. It's gonna be an early start, so don't be too late. Yours, Howard TJ Moon._

Lucy giggled to herself when she saw what Howard had written. Anna texted Lucy back about 10 minutes later.

_Luce, picnic sounds like fun Vince and me will be back soon. Cya later xxx_

"Vince and Anna are up for it," Lucy told Howard.

"Good. Naboo hasn't replied yet, so I'll just assume that they're coming too,"

"Let's get started on making the food, that way we can lie in tomorrow," Lucy suggested.

Howard and Lucy made their way over to the kitchen. Luckily Naboo and Bollo had been food shopping earlier that day so there was plenty of food.

"We can do tuna sandwiches, ham sandwiches, cheese sandwiches and chicken and bacon sandwiches. We've got three tins of Pringles that we can just shove in and some cookies that me and Anna made earlier," Lucy said, getting the food from the cupboards.

"Sounds good. Now let's get sandwich making," Howard grabbed two knifes from the draw, gave one to Lucy and started to butter the bread.

They made about twenty sandwiches in total and got through two packets of bread in the process. Just as they were wrapping the last of the sandwiches in Clingfilm the door opened and Naboo and Bollo walked in.

"Did you have a good time?" Lucy called.

"Yeah Kirk party fun. We take loads of drugs," Bollo grunted.

"Is this for the picnic?" Naboo asked pointing at the sandwiches and giant picnic basket which Howard had found.

"Yeah are you both coming?" Howard asked.

"Yeah we will," Naboo smiled.

"Now that we're done I'm gonna head off to bed," Lucy announced.

"Bollo tired too,"

"And me,"

"Ok, I'll just write Anna and Vince a note," Howard said getting out a pen and note pad

_Guys, we've all gone to bed. The food is in the fridge and we'll wake you up tomorrow when we need to leave. Yours, Howard TJ Moon._

Vince and Anna stumbled in at about 2.

"That was fun," Anna grinned at Vince.

"Yeah I told you it would be genius," Vince smiled at her enthusiasm.

"Looks like Howard left a note," Anna picked up the note and read it out loud. Like Lucy she laughed at the "Yours, Howard TJ Moon."

"Looks like an early morning," Vince said grimly.

"We'd better get some sleep then. Night Vince," Anna gave Vince a small hug.

"Night," Vince hugged her back and then walked to his room.

The next morning Anna was having one of the best dreams of her life. Somebody had given her £1million and told her to spend it all on clothes. Just as she was about to be given the money... "So shut up, shut up, shut up. Don't wanna hear it. Get up, get up, get up. Get out of my way. Step up, step up, step up. You'll never stop me. Nothing you say today. Is gonna bring me down," Lucy screamed the chorus of "Shut up" by simple plan while jumping on Anna's bed.

"OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?" Anna screamed pushing Lucy onto the floor.

"It's time to get up," Lucy said sweetly.

"It's 6 in the morning," Anna moaned.

"Yes and we need to leave at half 7 so that we can get there by 9," Howard said.

"Why do we need to get there by 9?" Anna demanded.

"So that we get a good picnic spot and we wanna go for a walk in the woods," Lucy was jumping with excitement.

"Are Bollo, Vince and Naboo awake yet?"

"Naboo and Bollo are, but Vince won't wake up. Could you maybe straighten his hair and get started on his make up so that he's ready in an hour?" Howard pleaded.

"Ok," Anna got out of bed and walked into Vince and Howard's room. "Vince, Vince wake up," Anna shook Vince.

"Urgggggg 10 more minutes," Vince moaned.

"I know it's early but Howard and Lucy are making us get up now," Anna said. Vince buried himself further under the covers as Anna spoke. Anna sighed but quickly came up with a plan. "VINCE VINCE VINCE, OH MY GOD YOUR HAIR LOOKS FRIZZY," Anna cried.

"AHHHHHH HOLY SHIT. ANNA PLEASE, YOU HAVE TO HELP ME!" Vince screamed like a young girl as he jumped out of bed.

"Vince, what are you doing to Anna?" Lucy strolled in grinning and joined Anna in her laughing attack.

"Shut up you mean bitches," Vince threw a pillow at the giggling twins.

"At least she got you out of bed," Lucy laughed.

"I'm gonna go do my hair and stuffs," Anna said walking back to her and Lucy's room.

"Where are we going anyway Luce?" Vince yawned.

"This place near the woods. Howard said he went there when he was a kid," Lucy smiled. Vince rolled his eyes and started straightening his hair.

10 minutes Vince was still straightening his hair and Anna was having trouble deciding what to wear. "Are you two gonna be long?" Naboo called "Howard's going mental,"

"It's only quarter to 7!" Anna yelled back.

"WE NEED TO LEAVE IN 44 MINUTES AND 37 SECONDS!" Howard squeaked making everybody jump.

"Ok keep your wig on small eyes," Vince groaned from his room.

44 minutes and 37 seconds later they were ready to leave. "FINALY!" Howard screamed as Vince and Anna emerged.

"Sorry, perfection is a delicate procedure," Anna said.

"He's gonna blow up in a minute," Naboo whispered as Howard pushed everybody into the car.

"How long journey take?" Bollo grunted about an hour later. They had been on the motorway for about half an hour and everybody was starting to get bored.

"Not long now," Howard grinned.

"I'm bored," Vince whined.

"Are we there yet?" Anna grinned evilly.

"Oh please don't you start that," Howard groaned.

"Are we there yet?" Lucy asked.

"Lucy," Howard growled.

"Are we there yet?" Vince giggled. By now Howard was shaking.

"Are we there yet?" Naboo asked innocently.

"DO YOU REALLY THINK WE'D STILL BE DRIVING IF WE WERE THERE?" Howard exploded.

"Yes," Anna said in a small voice.

"I give up with you lot," Howard muttered.

"Bollo see trees," the gorilla grunted.

"You see, I'm now stopping the car and what does that mean?" Howard asked.

"We've broken down?" Vince smirked.

"Just get out the van," Howard growled. Everybody quickly jumped out of the van and Bollo grabbed the picnic basket.

"We're gonna go for a walk first and eat later Bollo," Lucy said. Bollo put the basket back and went to join the others.

"Where are we walking?" Naboo asked.

"In the woods, we're gonna be at one with nature," Howard smiled. Anna and Vince exchanged a worried look.

"Are our clothes gonna be ok?" Vince demanded.

"Yes, just don't step in any cow shit," Lucy said.

"Cow shit? Can't the cows just go to the toilet like we do?" Anna asked.

"Please tell me you didn't mean that," Howard groaned at the prospect of having to explain nature to a dumb 16 year old girl.

"The cows are the wrong shape to use toilets," Naboo explained gently.

"How are they?" Vince asked.

"Just look at one," the shaman sighed.

They trudged along into the woods. There were a lot of trees so it would be easy to get lost. Howard insisted that everybody was careful and tried not to trip over and tree roots.

"I got a bad feeling about this," Bollo announced.

"Howard are we lost?" Lucy whispered to Howard.

"No, I'm just not 100% sure where we are," He whispered back.

All of a sudden there was a loud groan.

"What was that?" Vince whimpered and grabbed Anna's arm.

"Maybe it was just a friendly horse that's a bit lost," Anna tried to reassure him.

"That's likely," Howard said sarcastically. Vince gave a cry of fear and clung on to Anna for dear life.

"Shut up," Anna growled at Howard.

"Wait a minute, as a shaman I've got an internal Tom-Tom. We're not gonna die," Naboo cheered.

"We're not gonna die?" Vince whispered and starting jumping up and down like an excited 2 year old. Naboo shook his head and tried not to laugh at the electro poof.

They had been following Naboo's internal Tom-Tom for about half an hour now. Everybody, including Howard and Lucy were starting to get bored and the smell of cow shit was getting stronger.

"Are we near farm?" Bollo asked Howard.

"Yeah we are," Howard said as the cows came into sight.

"They look so cute!" Lucy squeaked.

"They look cooped up," Vince observed "I think we should let them out," he moved towards the gate and started to unhook it.

"VINCE, NO!" everybody shrieked as the gate flew open. The cows looked at each other, mooed happily at their new found freedom and began to charge out of the farm.

"HOLY FUCKING SHIT WE'RE GONNA DIE. RUN!" Lucy screamed.

"TO THE VAN!" Howard instructed.

There seemed to be millions of cows chasing the 6 of them. Bollo grabbed Naboo and Lucy so that they wouldn't get left behind or trampled by the crazy cattle.

"How much further is the van?" Vince panted

"Bollo see van, we almost there,"

The van was insight and they were almost there when Anna tripped and fell into the mud. "FUCKING BOLLOKING MUD!" She cried. Howard sighed and carried her to the van.

"Are you ok?" He asked.

"No, the bloody mud is covering me," Anna moaned.

"You can't go in the van like that. Lucky for you Howard Moon is a man of action and can give you some spare cloths to..."

"No time," Vince interrupted, grabbed Howard's long coat, put it on Anna's seat and shoved them both into the van.

"DRIVE HOWARD, THE COWS ARE ONLY 20 FEET AWAY!" Naboo panicked.

"So much for 'A fun day out'," Lucy grumbled.

"We could always have a picnic in the flat," Vince suggested. Everyone nodded at this idea.

When they got back to the flat Anna ran to her room, scraped her muddy cloths off, put on a dressing gown and gave the cloths to Vince. "Can you save these," she asked him.

"Yeah, we just made it," Vince sighed with relief.

Half an hour later Howard, Vince, Lucy, Naboo, Anna and Bollo were sat in the living room with their picnic. "We should have done this to begin with," Naboo said.

"Would of made more sense I guess," Lucy agreed.

"The country is good though," Howard said, getting weird looks from Anna and Vince.

"Howard, are all cows evil?" Vince asked innocently.

"I don't know Little Man. The ones that make our milk butter and cheese are nice," Howard smiled.

"Are they specially trained or do they have to pass a nice test?" Anna asked.

"They have to pass a nice test darling," Lucy rolled her eyes in despair.


End file.
